Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize