Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
