I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts