I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends