Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
