Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize