After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
