I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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