How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
