one might say we're banned from that church
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize