The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
