I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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