Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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