is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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