I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize