Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.