i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
