so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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