fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
