Define "chronic" masturbator.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
