another moral hangover. fuck.
4 words: hood of his car
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Randomize
