I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
