i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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