She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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