yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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