Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
