Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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