dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
