she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize