I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
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