it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
