You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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