Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
