the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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