I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize