i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
