she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize