I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
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It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
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I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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