White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
