Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
