we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
