I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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