their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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