She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.