I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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