yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
