Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
