I think my fart just growled at me.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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