A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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