no, he came in my armpit
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
