K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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