Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
