Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
